Anyone who’s ever had a dog knows what a pain it is to try to train a puppy. They’re constantly peeing and yelling, and they would much rather chew on all your delicious belongings than learn a bunch of useless commands. As it turns out — according to the Nintendogs speedrun, at least — the answer is twofold: One, give your puppy a short but recognisable name, like “L”, and two, take it back to the puppy shop the literal second it messes up. That’ll teach ’em!
(For the record, we do not condone resetting your puppy. We love puppies very much.)
“Hold on,” you cry — “what do you mean, “the Nintendogs speedrun?” Ah, good catch.
The most popular way of speedrunning Nintendogs is to get 1st place in all of the beginner contests — Obedience, which checks how good your pup is at following commands; Disc Throwing, which is a frisbee competition; and Agility, which is an obstacle course. You can train your dog, but that takes time, and speedrunning ain’t about that. The best thing to do is just get really lucky with your starter dog, and the RNG that dictates how well the competitions go.
The speedrun of Nintendogs is not a particularly popular one, even though the current run lasts anywhere between 11 and 25ish minutes, because so much of it is luck-based — which means pretty much anyone can give it a go and potentially do really well on the leaderboards.
So, that’s what YouTuber GappyV decided to do. He picked up a TOTALLY LEGITIMATE PC COPY of Nintendogs, and secured a third place record on his first go, with a 14 minute 7 second run. Sure, technically, there were only two records in his category… so any time would have made third place… but it only got better from there.
After finding out that his stream chat mod had sniped the first place record overnight with an 11 minute 49 second run, GappyV decided that it was no longer a joke. He would get that record.
And you know what? He totally did. With an 11 minute 6 second run, GappyV was — and still is, two months later — the undisputed world record holder for Nintendogs speedrunning in the Emulator Beginner Contest Golds category.